Tag Archive for reactions

Friends, Staying calm, Lasagna, Common decency

Basically I am writing in reaction to another blog I read earlier.

As a society there are certain acts that we just expect and shrug off.  But that is conforming.  I thought we were all supposed to be unique and stand for what we believe in.  Well, sometimes people do.  They just get fed up with all the bullshit from the fast paced day-to-day life.  There is no point in just letting out your personal stress on random strangers you may be riding the subway with or walking behind on the street.  I have great respect for those people.  A few years ago someone told me that it is important to always consider the other side and think about the other person.  As cliche as that sounds, it works.  It keeps me pretty calm.  And even though there are people out there who just look like they want to crush the world, there might be a story behind it.

Someone who works all day to come home, make dinner and go to bed cannot really enjoy their time.  So most nights I come home from school and kick back until someone suggests what to do for dinner.  The other day my mother called me in the middle of the day and asked what I wanted for dinner, suggesting lasagna.  Now, as a side note, I love my mom’s lasagna and macaroni and cheese.  You cannot beat it.  Don’t even try.  So when I came home I was really hungry because I spent the last three hours thinking about this lasagna.  My mom was out shopping and running errands and stuff so she was just getting to making it.

At this point I had two options.  Get all up in a huff because dinner wasn’t ready or sit and watch Law and Order because it didn’t really matter, I knew I was going to eat and my dad wasn’t home yet.  I went with option 2.  It takes much less energy to sit and relax than it does to get all pissed because of something small.  When the lasagna was ready, my mom gave me some without waiting for it to really cool off because “I’m glad you’re like this, you’re usually very calm.”  HA!  I got the lasagna faster being calm.  If I stormed off to my room, I would have no idea what the lasagna status was.

So that’s a small story with two people that ended well.  What if we flipped it.  This time I chose option 1.  Since the noodles had just finished and I am walking in the door ready to eat I flip on my mom.  She turns off the water and puts the sauce away and storms out of the house ranting about how she is never appreciated for the things she does.   I storm up to my room mumbling about how she only cares about herself.  I put on music and play some games.  My mom goes to Stop and Shop.  There she grabs a basket and goes over to the frozen foods section.  She throws a few frozen lasagna dinners in the basket and quickly gets to the check out lane.  The cashier is working alone and just dealt with a really big order by herself.  My mom throws the frozen lasagnas on the conveyer belt and fumbles through her purse looking for her Stop and Shop card.  By the time she found it the cashier has finished the order and already swiped her card for my mom.  My mom looks up and just grabs the lasagnas in a plastic bag and storms off now mumbling how she got short-changed because the cashier rushed her.  She comes home and makes the lasagnas in the microwave and calls me down.

Ok, I’ll stop there.  Too much unnessecary anger.  It is much simpler to step back for a second and ask yourself, “Is it really worth it to get angry about this?”  And sure, sometimes it is good to put your foot down and take a stand but if it won’t really accomplish anything then what’s the point?

So the big point here… just extend the common courtesies and decencies that you would like to have.  Oh crap, I’ve gone back to the Golden Rule.  I guess the Big Guy in the Sky really knows his stuff.

“Do unto others as you would have them do to you”  And if something really gets under your skin, call someone on it.  But ask why, that’s the important question.

Together we can make this world a better place to live in. (That one may be from Captain Planet.  “The power is yours!”)

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