So it’s been a long time. I was in those pesky summer classes and before I knew it, I was out of those classes and it had been 8 weeks. Building off the fact that I pretty much forgot about this place, I also haven’t ripped a single page off my calendar. So let’s get to it!
From Saturday April 18, 2009: “On Please, No Wisecracks…
JEANS: Low-rise styles
Continue to be poopular among young adults”
Sometimes stupid humor will be the part that makes everything better. This will come into play when I type out my reaction to group projects later on.
“On Hot Air: We Don’t know what those other [climate change] cycles were caused by in the past. It could be dinosaur flatulence. Who knows?
Rep. Dana Rohrabacher (R-California), during a congressional hearing on the global warming and climate change report, which concluded for the first time that there was an “unequivocal” link between human behavior and rising temperatures”
That’s just amazing. We farted too much. It is important that it is called climate change and not just “global warming”. The latter implies that the world is getting warmer but, in fact, the climates are getting more intense.
Ruh roh, this one hits close to home. From Wednesday, April 29, “On Yup, That About Sums It Up. The only way we’re going to improve is if we actually go out and get better.
Pittsburgh Pirates outfielder Jason Bay”
Well, even the best players make mistakes. Just look up Charles Barkley. Better yet? Don’t, you will either want to hurt yourself or die laughing. Jason Bay is the best thing to happen to the Red Sox since David Ortiz. That dude is on his way to a phenominal season.
Oh! I start work on Monday! Here’s a little something I hope to never hear.
From May 8: “On You Have More Problems Than That!
Tech Support: What seems to be the problem, sir?
Customer: Whenever I press the Backspace key, the letters I typed disappear.”
Yup, I work in IT. No one has ever said that to me but there are some rather disappointing problems that come up. I like to think they keep me on my toes.
This one is interesting not for the content but more for the person who submitted it.
“On Maybe You Should Rephrase That: And with sudden showers the tennis players might get their balls wet.
Canadian TV weatherman (thanks to Rev. David Peterson)”
See where I went with that? People of the Christian, non-Catholic faiths always seem to be way more relaxed. I could never imagine a Priest finding the humor in that… oh wait, that makes me think of bad things dealing with priests. Nevermind!! On to the next page.
Two reasons for the next one. There is a city named Lexington nearby and I don’t especially like them. It has to do mostly with high school track rivalry so no worries…
“On We’re Cutting Class After May 26:
Lexington Middle School
May 27, 28, 29
Last Day of School
sign outside a middle school — which was supposed to read ‘Final Exams’”
Either the sign person doesn’t like their job or they got fired. Maybe not. 8th Grade prank? Either way, pretty awesome.
Penis joke here. I’ll save it though, I could go on for a while about some stuff in this one.
Oh one about Dennis Rodman and not passing high school. Again, I’ll save it.
Just in case any one was scared,”On Phew, That’s a Relief: Atlantic Coast to Remain
headline in The Patriot-News (Harrisburg, Pennsylvania)”
I know a few people from Pennsylvania. They never seemed too worried about being in Boston, on the coast and all. I guess if they start to get nervous, I should really pay attention.
Back to baseball. Before I go into this one I just want to make a statement. (Pointless sentence to the left) Jerry Remy is not coming back. He is sick or something and Dennis Eckersley is way too much fun to let go at this point. NESN, please let the Rem-dawg go and bring Eck on full time. Once I get my laptop up and running and my backups back, I will throw up some good Eck quotes.
“On Statements, Superfluously Stupid: Willy Harris will bat for himself this inning.
Red Sox announcer Jerry Remy”
Everyone makes mistakes. Eck makes funny ones that don’t make your palm come to your face.
Well, that’s it. I saved a few for another day (maybe tomorrow if I get lucky). Congrats to me for completing my first summer semester and good luck to everyone out there in their adventures.